There is something about a son...that responsibility of raising him up to be not only a Godly man, but a radical man of God. This is very much just as important with women, but women's role in the bible is a little different than a man's. I am sure glad that I don't hold the burden of leading my family. My burden seems easy compared to my husband's role as father/husband. It's not a sexes thing, ladies, it's not a matter of superiority over us, but I do think that there is a divine calling and purpose of calling us to different roles. I hope to honor my role as a woman, instead of demeaning my Creator and His vision by comparing. I will now step off that box....
Silas and Philip were great men who's lives were a showcase to what it means to be a true man, giving up themselves and letting Christ rule and be exalted through them. Philip was called an Evangelist, and some say that he was the only one in the bible with that title. He went around proclaiming the Word of Jesus and in one story he actually teleports by the spirit?! Ya, I have no idea what happens...you should read it! (Acts 8:26-40) That can only mean that he was awesome. Silas' most famous story was when he and Paul get thrown into prison while on a missionary journey and start singing and dancing! An earthquake shakes the doors open, and the sweetest part (my favorite)...oh..I'll just quote...
"When the jailer awoke and saw the prison doors opened, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself, supposing that the prisoners had escaped. But Paul cried out with a loud voice, saying, "Do not harm yourself, for we are all here!" And he called for lights and rushed in, and trembling with fear he fell down before Paul and Silas, and after he brought them out, he said, "Sirs, what must I do to be saved?" They said, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household." Incredible.
This is our prayer for our daughters and our son...that they hear and learn from men such as these and see the true joy and value in following Jesus in a bold way, not just hearing a bible story. That wherever we, as parents, may fall short, they know to rely on His Word for guidance and Truth. And most importantly, they see through stories such as these, that salvation is a free gift to those who believe in Jesus Christ. We pray that they treasure the Cross and long to proclaim it to everyone. For His death gave us life...nothing we can do to earn it and nothing we can do to lose it. We are justified at the Cross.
You should know, that Jesus has held this baby boy in his hands from day one. It wasn't hard to get pregnant with the girls, and we had smooth pregnancies with no complications at all, other than morning sickness. He had them in His hands too, always protecting.
Silas, was somehow conceived in the same month we miscarried. In fact, when we went to our first appointment, around 6-7 weeks (we still don't know) we were even told that it was a blighted ovum, where there is a gestational sac, but no baby. We waited 10 days, came back to a strong heartbeat. A few weeks later, after discovering he was a 'he', the doctor told us that he had cysts on each lobe of his brain and that we had to run more test because he could have deformities such as trisomy 18 or 21. After a month, we went back to a follow-up ultrasound to make sure he was growing normally to find out the cysts had completely dissipated and he was in the 92 percentile on growth/weight!!!
I've learned how to pray all over again through this...there is nothing that we can't ask our Father for. Although I was okay if the outcome wasn't my choice, I knew that He wanted me to cry out to him with my fear and worry. It's only normal to want your child to be healthy. When I submitted to that, I carried a peace. I still asked for prayer from our family and friends, but I really rested in a peace I can't describe. He loves us and wants to carry our burdens...because they aren't burdens for Him. I posted on my facebook a quote from David Platt, where he spoke about Jesus being our sympathetic resonance...because Jesus was human too, He knows heartache. He gets it. So, next time, if you are like me and feel guilty for asking too many things, there's no such thing.
He hears our hearts, and answers prayer. It's not always our way or quickly, but He hears and "His Grace is Sufficient."
Monday, November 5, 2012
Thursday, November 10, 2011
The One Where We Relocate
One of the reasons we even discussed induction, other than the fact my doctor would be out of town, was because Spencer and I were fixing to make a huge move and job change. We had been apart of the search for a new worship leader for First Baptist Church Marlow that started in December and we were in the final stages where we go to 'In View of a Call' at the church and are voted in by the church members. In order to get a date set, Leslie needed to be born because I was not going to travel 3 hours away from my doctor anymore nor was I about to relocate and change doctors and hospitals! Not that anyone was rushing us or this event, but there was a goal start date for all parties and we were very ready and excited to get it going! It worked out so well....well obviously! We had her (which was a big deal) and 2 weeks later, after another big birthday (my sister's son), a wedding, and the weekend of events in Marlow leading to the 'In View of a Call' that Sunday, we were voted as the new contemporary worship leader!! About 2 weeks after that we were newbies to Outlaw country.
God called us here and in every possible way He kept and keeps confirming our decision to be obedient to His call. Was it hard leaving a church family and what we called our home and family? Absolutely. At the same time one of the most exciting times of our lives. We have two children the the Lord has given us and this move/job was an answered prayer. He knew our needs and provided. It was a hurricane of insanity during those times and we knew it would be challenging and we also knew that because we were being obedient that Satan would most definitely be attacking. He did, but our battles were already overcome. Looking back, a new baby, a toddler adjusting to new baby, a move, a toddler adjusting to a move, and leaving everything known to enter into a new life of unknowns doesn't sound like something I would be interested in, but that is the beauty of our Jesus. It's so amazing how he takes care of us. Even in finding our house. Because we moved so fast, we didn't have time to look at homes and moved into an old 'dentists office' that is apart of the church's property. Not the best living quarters for our particular situation, but we only stayed there for 3 weeks and were very thankful that it was an option. Found a house the very day we moved that was being flipped and it just so happened it was in our price range and move-in ready! Met Jacinda, the owner, loved her, she was kind enough to let us move in before we closed!! Who even does that?!! The whole church family is like that! We have never been more embraced or loved on, which made the move 100 times easier! Now, we feel like we've always lived here and it's only been 5 months!
First Baptist Marlow is a small town church with the biggest heart! The senior pastor, Joe, is an obedient man of God and is great at being a pastor and also a wonderful speaker. The evidence is the growing number of members and the blessings the church reaps. It's very refreshing to be apart of a church that cares about being obedient to God's word no matter what. Come visit or visit us online! Just search First Baptist Church Marlow! You can even see the sexiest, sweetest, hunkiest music leader (but you can't say that about him)! He leads a mean worship time that captives a sinners heart to value true worship to our one and only Redeemer!! Amen!
God called us here and in every possible way He kept and keeps confirming our decision to be obedient to His call. Was it hard leaving a church family and what we called our home and family? Absolutely. At the same time one of the most exciting times of our lives. We have two children the the Lord has given us and this move/job was an answered prayer. He knew our needs and provided. It was a hurricane of insanity during those times and we knew it would be challenging and we also knew that because we were being obedient that Satan would most definitely be attacking. He did, but our battles were already overcome. Looking back, a new baby, a toddler adjusting to new baby, a move, a toddler adjusting to a move, and leaving everything known to enter into a new life of unknowns doesn't sound like something I would be interested in, but that is the beauty of our Jesus. It's so amazing how he takes care of us. Even in finding our house. Because we moved so fast, we didn't have time to look at homes and moved into an old 'dentists office' that is apart of the church's property. Not the best living quarters for our particular situation, but we only stayed there for 3 weeks and were very thankful that it was an option. Found a house the very day we moved that was being flipped and it just so happened it was in our price range and move-in ready! Met Jacinda, the owner, loved her, she was kind enough to let us move in before we closed!! Who even does that?!! The whole church family is like that! We have never been more embraced or loved on, which made the move 100 times easier! Now, we feel like we've always lived here and it's only been 5 months!
First Baptist Marlow is a small town church with the biggest heart! The senior pastor, Joe, is an obedient man of God and is great at being a pastor and also a wonderful speaker. The evidence is the growing number of members and the blessings the church reaps. It's very refreshing to be apart of a church that cares about being obedient to God's word no matter what. Come visit or visit us online! Just search First Baptist Church Marlow! You can even see the sexiest, sweetest, hunkiest music leader (but you can't say that about him)! He leads a mean worship time that captives a sinners heart to value true worship to our one and only Redeemer!! Amen!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
The One When Leslie Was Born
Okay, okay, I haven't written in almost a year! That went by fast! So many things happened, so I'll start from where I left off...
The last post was in January and I was still pregnant with Leslie (which her name was still a secret), and I was due in April. Well, she was born a week early on the morning of March 31, 2011 at 10:13am. Completely perfect weighing 7lbs 10oz (Audrey was 7lbs 9oz) with a ton of jet black gorgeous hair and a tan. She did resemble Audrey, but was also so so different! She has tiny features and is very elegant in her motions.
The labor and delivery was amazingly smooth....here's the story.
For reasons I will talk about in another blog and the fact that our doctor would be out of town, we discussed inducing at 39 weeks (side note- I don't agree with inducing just to induce and neither does our OB, but he has a different school of thought for 2nd babies and it can only be a week before due date and you had to be at least dilated to a 3.) But, we agreed to be induced and of course I couldn't really make up my mind. I didn't like it. So, I called our sweet nurse and told her to cancel our induction for that Thursday. We went in that Wednesday for a regular appointment and I had changed my mind again...thankfully the nurse knew me and disregarded my request and we still had our induction date. He checked me that day and we were at a 3, so all was good to continue! After the appointment, I went with Spence to his 2nd job (Parview Baptist) to help him get things in order, then we were going to get dinner before the normal Wednesday church events. I started having contractions. They started as soon as we got to the church and intensified enough to pay attention to how far apart they were. I was so thankful because I didn't like the thought of being induced. So, they were about 20-30 min apart. Spencer told the guys we were gonna leave to eat and that I was contracting and we went to Red Lobster per my request of a last stuffing and while we were there, they shortened to 5 min apart. We were excited and calm at the same time. I wanted to finish eating, and we got our waitress involved in our excitement until my sister told me to get to a hospital!! No dessert for us, we is gonna go have a baby!
We call for grandma to come stay with Audrey and grab our bags and head for St. Francis South!
It's always awkward walking in...especially in a calm manner. Not at all like the movies where it's obvious I'm in labor, so I say, "Hello, I know you're probably busy, but I think I'm in labor." and then you go sit in a waiting room until they get you a room ready. It was like that with Audrey too. It just feels like people should be screaming and rushing and that you shouldn't have to wait in a waiting room for your turn. Crazy!
I really didn't have to wait a long time and they got me settled in our room and the monitors on the baby and sure enough I am now contracting every 2-3 min! Looks like we're having a baby tonight, right?!! WRONG! After about an hour of contracting and not moving from a 3 it just stopped. They had me walk the hospital and it just wasn't happening. But, remember I am already scheduled to be induced that next day, so they just kept me overnight and started Pitocin at 6:00am the next morning. Of course, I didn't sleep at all. At 6:10, the contractions started again, this time they hurt pretty darn bad and progressively worsened for a good 2 hours! Finally got the good stuff and it was easy breezy from then until she was born a little over 4 hours later. With both girls the delivery went way to perfect and quick, which I am very thankful for. Now, I have TWO precious, perfect, sweet girls! I love that the Lord had us in his timing. I was anxious about inducing and going into labor the night before gave me peace that she was ready.
Giving birth is one of the sweetest gifts we can have as women! That's why we love to tell the stories!
Is this it? I don't know...we'll have to wait and see!
The last post was in January and I was still pregnant with Leslie (which her name was still a secret), and I was due in April. Well, she was born a week early on the morning of March 31, 2011 at 10:13am. Completely perfect weighing 7lbs 10oz (Audrey was 7lbs 9oz) with a ton of jet black gorgeous hair and a tan. She did resemble Audrey, but was also so so different! She has tiny features and is very elegant in her motions.
The labor and delivery was amazingly smooth....here's the story.
For reasons I will talk about in another blog and the fact that our doctor would be out of town, we discussed inducing at 39 weeks (side note- I don't agree with inducing just to induce and neither does our OB, but he has a different school of thought for 2nd babies and it can only be a week before due date and you had to be at least dilated to a 3.) But, we agreed to be induced and of course I couldn't really make up my mind. I didn't like it. So, I called our sweet nurse and told her to cancel our induction for that Thursday. We went in that Wednesday for a regular appointment and I had changed my mind again...thankfully the nurse knew me and disregarded my request and we still had our induction date. He checked me that day and we were at a 3, so all was good to continue! After the appointment, I went with Spence to his 2nd job (Parview Baptist) to help him get things in order, then we were going to get dinner before the normal Wednesday church events. I started having contractions. They started as soon as we got to the church and intensified enough to pay attention to how far apart they were. I was so thankful because I didn't like the thought of being induced. So, they were about 20-30 min apart. Spencer told the guys we were gonna leave to eat and that I was contracting and we went to Red Lobster per my request of a last stuffing and while we were there, they shortened to 5 min apart. We were excited and calm at the same time. I wanted to finish eating, and we got our waitress involved in our excitement until my sister told me to get to a hospital!! No dessert for us, we is gonna go have a baby!
We call for grandma to come stay with Audrey and grab our bags and head for St. Francis South!
It's always awkward walking in...especially in a calm manner. Not at all like the movies where it's obvious I'm in labor, so I say, "Hello, I know you're probably busy, but I think I'm in labor." and then you go sit in a waiting room until they get you a room ready. It was like that with Audrey too. It just feels like people should be screaming and rushing and that you shouldn't have to wait in a waiting room for your turn. Crazy!
I really didn't have to wait a long time and they got me settled in our room and the monitors on the baby and sure enough I am now contracting every 2-3 min! Looks like we're having a baby tonight, right?!! WRONG! After about an hour of contracting and not moving from a 3 it just stopped. They had me walk the hospital and it just wasn't happening. But, remember I am already scheduled to be induced that next day, so they just kept me overnight and started Pitocin at 6:00am the next morning. Of course, I didn't sleep at all. At 6:10, the contractions started again, this time they hurt pretty darn bad and progressively worsened for a good 2 hours! Finally got the good stuff and it was easy breezy from then until she was born a little over 4 hours later. With both girls the delivery went way to perfect and quick, which I am very thankful for. Now, I have TWO precious, perfect, sweet girls! I love that the Lord had us in his timing. I was anxious about inducing and going into labor the night before gave me peace that she was ready.
Giving birth is one of the sweetest gifts we can have as women! That's why we love to tell the stories!
Is this it? I don't know...we'll have to wait and see!
Monday, January 17, 2011
Baby Girl Shaw Check-in
Well, I am 28 weeks and a few days now only 12 more weeks til go time! I keep saying how fast this has flown compared to Audrey, but I can't even keep track of what week I am on most of the time, I have to rely on my calender! It does help to be consumed with a toddler, work or school for most people. I didn't have either with the bulk of Audrey, so maybe that's why I am surprised.
I had my last visit a couple of weeks ago and had to take my glucose test. I always skip the explanations and such in the books because I've always been confident I would pass. Well, I didn't. I failed by one point. After I got the phone call, I was pretty upset for a good part of the day, it really scared me. I was instructed to come back to the office asap to do the 3 hour testing, which is more extreme and accurate. When Spencer got home that day I fell in his arms to seek comfort and guidance, I felt like I had hurt her. The entire visit was off for me that day. My blood pressure was high, for me, not high as in dangerous or alarming, but still not normal for me and I couldn't catch my breath. Our visit with the doctor was cut short because of the testing and it was time for me to get my blood drawn. So, I didn't really get to focus on the ultrasound b/c I had a question and he had a PA shadowing him that day. Needless to say it was an awkward visit and to get a call that I didn't pass was upsetting and left me anxious. We thought back to the entire day leading up to the visit...I workout on MWF with a skilled, trustworthy, and experienced (with preggos) trainer, it was a Wednesday and I worked out a little longer than normal and rushed home to feed Audrey lunch, get her in bed for a nap, take a shower, get ready, eat lunch, and I had to drink the glucose drink 45 min before we came to the doctor. I had all this to do within a 2 hour time frame. So, I think it was a combination of running around, working out, hot shower, fast lunch, and taking care of a toddler that got me all screwed up. I had also drank a Gatorade that morning, which I never do, but it contains a lot of salt, which could raise my blood pressure. Anyway, I felt better after analyzing the day and went back to feeling confident that I would pass the 3 hour test, which I did with flying colors. I later found out that a lot of women fail the first test and pass the second, because it is more accurate and has you to fast. So, I am calm, cool, and collected. We go back on the 26th of this month and start going every two weeks! I am due April 7th and I bet I am right on...I was only a day late with Audrey and I went into labor on my own. I am hoping and praying for a delivery like Audrey...it was quick and easy.
We are on the downhill now! I am so excited and I am excited for my sister and all my friends who are pregnant! Motherhood is amazing!!
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Christmas/New Year
I am just now getting to sit down and write...it was a very busy holiday season for the Shaw's! This year was a little different for my little family. Spencer and I wanted to start our own traditions and be at our own home for Christmas Eve and Christmas day, especially since we are always on the go anyway, we want the season to be calm and centered around the 'true' meaning of Christmas and acknowledge the blessings of having a family. So, we did just that! Our little family of 3 packed up on Christmas Eve and went to the service our church offered and celebrated with our church family. We later went on home to enjoy each other and prepare for the next day! I think I was way more excited for this year, because of Audrey, than ever before. I was thinking she would flip out when we got her up and walked her in the living room where all her presents were stacked from Santa, but she went straight to an old toy and I knew she had absolutely no clue what was so special about that day! I ended up opening all her (and sister's) presents she got from us or anyone else. I think this next year will be much for exciting for her and it will only get better and better as we teach her about Jesus! We did end up going to see Spencer's mom and dad in Owasso later that night (kind-of spontaneous). It was one of the best visits we've ever had. Spencer's brother and his family also came (since they live in Oklahoma now!!!) and it always makes it loud and goofy! Jim (Spencer's) dad, lives at Baptist Village there in Owasso, and his mom lives on campus, so it is always special when we can all get together for him to see the babies and be involved. There is an adorable room that we sometimes go to there called the "tea room" when everyone is here, or we know there is a party to be had. Very special memories for us all! We are thankful that we can do that!
The day after Christmas was a Sunday, so a work day for Spence, but after church we headed to my parents house to have Christmas with my family in Seminole. My sister and her hubby, Curtis, joined us for an evening of food and laughter! I posted a few of those pictures on my facebook. It was a short visit sadly, but we are grateful that we got to go. We didn't have 'real' Christmas with Spencer's family until the 1st so that his sister and her family of 4 would be here. They live in Houston. This would be one of the occasions that we all gathered in the 'tea room'! It is always a riot when we all get together! The kids (5) all run around or dance to music and the adults chase and eat and dance too. The pictures I posted on facebook show some of the chaos that makes our hearts cheer! Oh ya...we also had a special visit from Santa! Yep! He made a special trip just for us after Christmas! The only ones that actually sat on his lap without fear were Audrey, Jeb and Sydney. Jo and Brooklyn were not so sure about this strange man with his jolly laugh!
We rang in the new year with a trip to Zios and to see the Rhema lights in BA and back to Owasso. My parents stayed with Audrey at our house that night to spend some extra time with her since our Christmas trip was too short. They are the sweetest grandparents ever and she has a blast with them!
Highlights from 2010 that pop in my head are...the trip to Venezuela, Audrey turning 1, and getting pregnant with our 2nd!! There were also many, many wonderful memories made as well as challenges, but I am so very thankful for a new year!
May our new beginnings be new beginnings centered around Christ and glorifying His kingdom, for that is our sole purpose in life.
Blessings from the Shaw's
Monday, December 20, 2010
2011 already?!!
I have not kept up with this blog as well as I thought I would! Time is flying! I have a draft saved from Thanksgiving, but now that it is Christmas I guess that will be moved into the trash bucket. One reason it is hard to keep up lately is sickness has hit our family hardcore and it actually started Thanksgiving night when my husband (who btw has never thrown up in his life) got a violent stomach bug rendering him useless for a good 48 hours. This is also not a characteristic of Spence, he has so much energy that most sicknesses can't keep him down. It was sad and I felt helpless. This bug then reached my brother and sister-in-laws home starting with their kiddos and rounding to them. After about 3 rounds with the kids it moved on to my mother-in-law and then on to my daughter and finally to me. It is awful. I bet after reading this no one will ever want to sit by us again. It was inevitable though, we see each other pretty much everyday so it makes it hard (especially with kids) to keep 100% disinfected no matter how careful and it seems to br going around period. BUT...everyone is well now, so fear not!
New baby girl update: My last OB appointment was at 23 weeks, we call this the 'big' appointment since the doc was checking on all her developing organs to make sure they are growing/functioning correctly. She was measuring a pound (I was measuring 15!!yikes!) and using the doctors words "growing perfectly"! Every mom loves pretty words at a check up and he used many! I have been feeling great which I am so thankful for! The only snag is sleeping, I am getting into the uncomfortable stage and since the air is dry and a pregnancy symptom is a stuffy, dry nose I am relying on breathe right strips and a humidifier...glamorous huh?! My hubs says I'm cutest pregnant, so I never get embarrassed. It is so funny how pregnancy makes him so much more lovey dovey and mushy! Not that he isn't otherwise, but pregnant Kerri sure gets a lot of attention, yes, even through the mood swings which only make him laugh. He is my hotbodhandsome pants.
Audrey isn't quite sure what is going on as far as my growing belly. She is in learning mode and I fear we have confused her by calling my belly a 'belly' or 'baby'. She lifted daddy's shirt the other day pointing at his belly saying "baby!" So, we've quit trying to explain. She knows what a baby is outside of the womb and her mommy instincts have already kicked in without having a baby around, so I am confident she will be in love with new baby sister! She loves to take care of her stuffed animals by sharing her food and juice with them and taking them on a stroll. They have to sleep with her and when she wakes up, they come too. I think this has been my favorite age. She can't talk sentences yet, but it is so fun to sort of communicate! She is naturally so tender and sweet. We love her and can't wait to meet new baby! (I wish I could scream her name to everyone, but I made a promise to my hubby! Only 3 more months!)
Well...Christmas is almost here and a new year! It is refreshing to see so many people preparing for Christs birthday and remembering that because of this special birthday we have undeserving salvation! Praise his holy name! Jesus!
Love all the Shaw's
New baby girl update: My last OB appointment was at 23 weeks, we call this the 'big' appointment since the doc was checking on all her developing organs to make sure they are growing/functioning correctly. She was measuring a pound (I was measuring 15!!yikes!) and using the doctors words "growing perfectly"! Every mom loves pretty words at a check up and he used many! I have been feeling great which I am so thankful for! The only snag is sleeping, I am getting into the uncomfortable stage and since the air is dry and a pregnancy symptom is a stuffy, dry nose I am relying on breathe right strips and a humidifier...glamorous huh?! My hubs says I'm cutest pregnant, so I never get embarrassed. It is so funny how pregnancy makes him so much more lovey dovey and mushy! Not that he isn't otherwise, but pregnant Kerri sure gets a lot of attention, yes, even through the mood swings which only make him laugh. He is my hotbodhandsome pants.
Audrey isn't quite sure what is going on as far as my growing belly. She is in learning mode and I fear we have confused her by calling my belly a 'belly' or 'baby'. She lifted daddy's shirt the other day pointing at his belly saying "baby!" So, we've quit trying to explain. She knows what a baby is outside of the womb and her mommy instincts have already kicked in without having a baby around, so I am confident she will be in love with new baby sister! She loves to take care of her stuffed animals by sharing her food and juice with them and taking them on a stroll. They have to sleep with her and when she wakes up, they come too. I think this has been my favorite age. She can't talk sentences yet, but it is so fun to sort of communicate! She is naturally so tender and sweet. We love her and can't wait to meet new baby! (I wish I could scream her name to everyone, but I made a promise to my hubby! Only 3 more months!)
Well...Christmas is almost here and a new year! It is refreshing to see so many people preparing for Christs birthday and remembering that because of this special birthday we have undeserving salvation! Praise his holy name! Jesus!
Love all the Shaw's
Saturday, October 30, 2010
17 weeks and counting!
Yes, another baby Shaw is on her way! We couldn't be more thrilled! Being pregnant is such a surreal time for me. I thought that with a second I would maybe lose that, but nope! I am just as much in awe that something is growing in me as with our first.
The only thing I can't stand about pregnancy is the morning sickness and I tend to be more sick than a 'average' pregnancy. When I was pregnant with Audrey, I ended up in the hospital 3 times, once over 24 hours because of the severity of my sickness. I lost 10lbs and couldn't keep water down. This lasted until about 6 months and I was even taking Zofran to help. This time around wasn't as intense, but I was pretty sick for the first couple of months. I never lost weight, but didn't gain. The hard part about being sick this time is that I have another little person that depends on me to take care of her. I was determind to mentally block out how awful I felt in order to have the strength to take care of her. I cried often. I felt like I was either neglecting Audrey or baby in some way by not focusing 100% on either one. I guess that is somewhat how it will go from now on...balancing my time with two babies that I love equally.
This pregnancy is also special because my sister is pregnant and due around the same time! It is fun to call each other and relay our hardships and perks to one another! It's like a dream come true for my mom too, she is going nuts! She has fallen in love with embroidery and is just waiting to start on about a million projects for her newest grandchildren. She is a wonderful nana! Spencer and I have decided to wait til our newest daughter is born to tell her name and this drives nana crazzzzy! hahaha! It's fun and a test for me because I tend to tell her everything whether or not I intended to or not, she has powers over me. *sorry mom you can't put her name on things til after her birthday!*
So excited that Audrey gets a sister! I loooved having a sister! 17 weeks and counting!
The only thing I can't stand about pregnancy is the morning sickness and I tend to be more sick than a 'average' pregnancy. When I was pregnant with Audrey, I ended up in the hospital 3 times, once over 24 hours because of the severity of my sickness. I lost 10lbs and couldn't keep water down. This lasted until about 6 months and I was even taking Zofran to help. This time around wasn't as intense, but I was pretty sick for the first couple of months. I never lost weight, but didn't gain. The hard part about being sick this time is that I have another little person that depends on me to take care of her. I was determind to mentally block out how awful I felt in order to have the strength to take care of her. I cried often. I felt like I was either neglecting Audrey or baby in some way by not focusing 100% on either one. I guess that is somewhat how it will go from now on...balancing my time with two babies that I love equally.
This pregnancy is also special because my sister is pregnant and due around the same time! It is fun to call each other and relay our hardships and perks to one another! It's like a dream come true for my mom too, she is going nuts! She has fallen in love with embroidery and is just waiting to start on about a million projects for her newest grandchildren. She is a wonderful nana! Spencer and I have decided to wait til our newest daughter is born to tell her name and this drives nana crazzzzy! hahaha! It's fun and a test for me because I tend to tell her everything whether or not I intended to or not, she has powers over me. *sorry mom you can't put her name on things til after her birthday!*
So excited that Audrey gets a sister! I loooved having a sister! 17 weeks and counting!
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Venezuela
My best blogs are written in my head at night when I can't sleep, but I am too tired to get up and find the laptop or go to our desktop. It is a shame because in my head they sound so well written and the grammar and spelling are perfect. I imagine someone like Morgan Freeman narrating it. Never turns out that way when I have the time to actually write. Anyway, I will attempt to pursue my blog even with all the grammar/spelling issues. It is good therapy, and at least my mom reads it. This blog I wanted to finally share about my trip to Venezuela!
Since this is my blog, I can say anything I want, so I will tell you about the trip in terms of what happened to me personally. Just to let you know though, there are so many other great things that I witnessed God doing in the lives of the people there and on our team, but I want to share about my breakthrough.
I had mentioned in a previous blog my fears of going; I never mentioned my fears of not going. This trip was such a big decision for me. I say for me and not "us" for a reason. My husband didn't share the same fears as I, and, with him being a man and a man of our home lead him to feel differently. My fears weren't just with leaving my one-year-old daughter, it was also a fear of disobedience. I never got a sense of a 'right' or 'wrong' choice, but Satan sure made me feel that way with filling my mind with lies. I became confused with my role...either on mission or a wife and mother, because the Bible calls us all to Go and also calls us to be a witness with our roles as wives and mothers. Obviously, I had a skewed view of what that meant. I kept feeling so torn, feeling guilt for one choice or the other. Finally, with prayer and the advice from a mentor, I decided to go. After I had made the decision and the funds were in, about a week before we were to leave I got attacked major. I asked for prayer from our church family and began to see a theme show up EVERYWHERE! To pray, pray, pray and to cry out to Him with every fear! The beauty of going on a foreign trip is that it almost makes it easier to do that. I mean...it was literally all I had. I had no other comforts to put in the place of God. Yes, my husband, but this was bigger than him and he can't always offer me the comfort that my Jesus can. Let me tell you about some instances were God answered prayers for me in that 12 days.
The second we landed I turned on my phone to call home...we had traveled all night and I just wanted to check on my baby. My phone wouldn't work. I had talked to our provider on several occasions to make sure this didn't happen and it did. We had another 8 hour bus ride to our actual destination. The bus was old and full of exhaust that there was literally a haze in the cabin and it was very crowded with our team and the locals that came to greet us. It was so awful we were all coughing and hacking. The bus broke down about 5 miles away from the airport we landed in...meaning a new, better, safer bus was on the way. We had to wait 5 hours for it, but it was so much better. I slept the whole way to our hotel, which meant I didn't worry about the phone and Audrey the whole time. Since we were arriving later than planned because of the bus situation we lost our reservation. Initially, Spence and I were supposed to be separated at night because we had one single female and male on our team. Because we lost the reservations, we ended up together. Later that evening, I was able to fix my phone and call home...phone worked the whole time. Traffic laws are not obeyed there nor do they have seat belts in the backseats (I really don't know why this is) they also drive way too fast. I was always with Spencer and we only had to travel 2 hours away twice and the rest of the week we stayed within 30 min. Little, but significant things like this happened all day everyday! I honestly believe I witnessed God answer prayers for me and brought me home safely from a violent country that I'd never been to, to show me that He is in control and is sovereign. I needed to turn my fear into faith. I came home feeling like my life was literally saved. It was a miracle. I also bonded with my husband that week in ways that we may not have otherwise. I came home with a new understanding of my role as a wife, mother, and servant of Christ. I don't think I will be going on anymore foreign trips for awhile, but I am on mission here and part of that is showing His love through being a wife and mother. Foreign missions is a passion of mine, but I now know that I can go without going through prayer and hopefully once our children are grown take more opportunities. There is plenty of mission work to do in our backyards, but I am so glad I went on this one!
Oh ya...one more thing...The day we got back from our trip, I found out I was pregnant with our second daughter!
Our God is an awesome God!
Since this is my blog, I can say anything I want, so I will tell you about the trip in terms of what happened to me personally. Just to let you know though, there are so many other great things that I witnessed God doing in the lives of the people there and on our team, but I want to share about my breakthrough.
I had mentioned in a previous blog my fears of going; I never mentioned my fears of not going. This trip was such a big decision for me. I say for me and not "us" for a reason. My husband didn't share the same fears as I, and, with him being a man and a man of our home lead him to feel differently. My fears weren't just with leaving my one-year-old daughter, it was also a fear of disobedience. I never got a sense of a 'right' or 'wrong' choice, but Satan sure made me feel that way with filling my mind with lies. I became confused with my role...either on mission or a wife and mother, because the Bible calls us all to Go and also calls us to be a witness with our roles as wives and mothers. Obviously, I had a skewed view of what that meant. I kept feeling so torn, feeling guilt for one choice or the other. Finally, with prayer and the advice from a mentor, I decided to go. After I had made the decision and the funds were in, about a week before we were to leave I got attacked major. I asked for prayer from our church family and began to see a theme show up EVERYWHERE! To pray, pray, pray and to cry out to Him with every fear! The beauty of going on a foreign trip is that it almost makes it easier to do that. I mean...it was literally all I had. I had no other comforts to put in the place of God. Yes, my husband, but this was bigger than him and he can't always offer me the comfort that my Jesus can. Let me tell you about some instances were God answered prayers for me in that 12 days.
The second we landed I turned on my phone to call home...we had traveled all night and I just wanted to check on my baby. My phone wouldn't work. I had talked to our provider on several occasions to make sure this didn't happen and it did. We had another 8 hour bus ride to our actual destination. The bus was old and full of exhaust that there was literally a haze in the cabin and it was very crowded with our team and the locals that came to greet us. It was so awful we were all coughing and hacking. The bus broke down about 5 miles away from the airport we landed in...meaning a new, better, safer bus was on the way. We had to wait 5 hours for it, but it was so much better. I slept the whole way to our hotel, which meant I didn't worry about the phone and Audrey the whole time. Since we were arriving later than planned because of the bus situation we lost our reservation. Initially, Spence and I were supposed to be separated at night because we had one single female and male on our team. Because we lost the reservations, we ended up together. Later that evening, I was able to fix my phone and call home...phone worked the whole time. Traffic laws are not obeyed there nor do they have seat belts in the backseats (I really don't know why this is) they also drive way too fast. I was always with Spencer and we only had to travel 2 hours away twice and the rest of the week we stayed within 30 min. Little, but significant things like this happened all day everyday! I honestly believe I witnessed God answer prayers for me and brought me home safely from a violent country that I'd never been to, to show me that He is in control and is sovereign. I needed to turn my fear into faith. I came home feeling like my life was literally saved. It was a miracle. I also bonded with my husband that week in ways that we may not have otherwise. I came home with a new understanding of my role as a wife, mother, and servant of Christ. I don't think I will be going on anymore foreign trips for awhile, but I am on mission here and part of that is showing His love through being a wife and mother. Foreign missions is a passion of mine, but I now know that I can go without going through prayer and hopefully once our children are grown take more opportunities. There is plenty of mission work to do in our backyards, but I am so glad I went on this one!
Oh ya...one more thing...The day we got back from our trip, I found out I was pregnant with our second daughter!
Our God is an awesome God!
Monday, June 14, 2010
Marriage
Yesterday our Pastor, Bill Hulse, spoke about one of my favorite things…marriage. We are doing a rich study of the book of Matthew and we are in chapter 5 where Jesus is fulfilling the law. This sermon was so great (in my opinion it was the best yet) because he communicated it well and simple, making it even more potent to the congregation. Of course, I will be paraphrasing and expressing my favorite points of the sermon, but if you are interested and wish to hear Pastor Bill’s sermon, please send me a message and I can send you a cd. I think I wanted to blog about this particular sermon because it seems to be wedding season and there is great truth that our society has lost the purpose of marriage. We as a body of Christ and as believers need to correct this lie and be examples and understand what marriage was created for.
First, we were brought to the reality that we (meaning even Christians) have made marriage a joke. Spencer and I had agreed to try to avoid sarcasm, belittling, name calling, or anything else that may seem harmless while dating. This teasing seems harmless, but in fact can creep in and cause damage. When Spencer and I were preparing to get married many people said things like, “you just wait till your honeymoon is over and you’ll wish you were single again!”…this is a huge pet peeve of mine. Those same people say those discouraging things when we were about to have our daughter…and I can’t help but try to lovingly disagree. It blows my mind. And honestly, I don’t think they would intentionally mean to be discouraging, but they have bought into ‘worldly’ teasing without realizing that it is unhealthy. See, I believe that when you joke or make fun of those wonderful blessings God gave us, we let Satan in, and subtly we fall away from God’s intentions.
We then went to Genesis to the first marriage, Adam and Eve. (Genesis 2:18-25) God says that it isn’t good for man to be alone and after he created all the animals, there still wasn’t a helper suitable for Adam. So, then out of Adam’s side God takes one of his ribs and makes Eve. When Adam wakes up from his surgery he said and understood that they were one flesh. Oh and another cool thing that I learned was a tradition that EVERYONE keeps at wedding ceremonies…also found in that chapter. It says in verse 22, “The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man and BROUGHT HER TO THE MAN.” There you go. So when our fathers walk us down the aisle and the pastor asks “who gives this woman to this man” know it’s because God did it first. More proof that marriage isn’t something we made up, God designed it and designed it to have a purpose. Cool stuff!
‘One flesh’ is an example used to not only describe our marriage on earth, but our marriage to Christ. This is the purpose of marriage and why God created it. It is a ministry. It shows a picture and lets us understand intimacy. If we didn’t have this example it would be hard to know that type of relationship with our heavenly Father.
Back in Matthew 5:31, Jesus talks about divorce and references Deuteronomy 24:1-4 where Moses talks about divorce and the right men have to leave their wives. There are two schools of thought because of how Moses communicates this and what it says in Matthew. Obviously our society has a skewed view of divorce because the statistics are staggering, but that is not what they are talking about when referring to it in the bible, there is more…and even the Pharisees tried to justify when testing Jesus in Mark 10. They start questioning Moses’ statement about just getting a certificate of divorce and still being righteous, but Jesus comes back saying in my pastors words, “it is a heart issue”, meaning just because you do the acts to get a “correct divorce” doesn’t mean you fixed anything…the problem is a hardened heart. And Jesus also states that because we are made one flesh in marriage, “What therefore God has joined together let no man separate.” This answers their question of whether or not is makes divorce ‘right’.
Now…as much as I believe that divorce is wrong, I know that there are circumstances that divorce is seemingly the best option and also that it falls within biblical parameters. I am not speaking about that. But, the last thing my pastor said was profound, true, and forgotten. God restores!
First, we were brought to the reality that we (meaning even Christians) have made marriage a joke. Spencer and I had agreed to try to avoid sarcasm, belittling, name calling, or anything else that may seem harmless while dating. This teasing seems harmless, but in fact can creep in and cause damage. When Spencer and I were preparing to get married many people said things like, “you just wait till your honeymoon is over and you’ll wish you were single again!”…this is a huge pet peeve of mine. Those same people say those discouraging things when we were about to have our daughter…and I can’t help but try to lovingly disagree. It blows my mind. And honestly, I don’t think they would intentionally mean to be discouraging, but they have bought into ‘worldly’ teasing without realizing that it is unhealthy. See, I believe that when you joke or make fun of those wonderful blessings God gave us, we let Satan in, and subtly we fall away from God’s intentions.
We then went to Genesis to the first marriage, Adam and Eve. (Genesis 2:18-25) God says that it isn’t good for man to be alone and after he created all the animals, there still wasn’t a helper suitable for Adam. So, then out of Adam’s side God takes one of his ribs and makes Eve. When Adam wakes up from his surgery he said and understood that they were one flesh. Oh and another cool thing that I learned was a tradition that EVERYONE keeps at wedding ceremonies…also found in that chapter. It says in verse 22, “The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man and BROUGHT HER TO THE MAN.” There you go. So when our fathers walk us down the aisle and the pastor asks “who gives this woman to this man” know it’s because God did it first. More proof that marriage isn’t something we made up, God designed it and designed it to have a purpose. Cool stuff!
‘One flesh’ is an example used to not only describe our marriage on earth, but our marriage to Christ. This is the purpose of marriage and why God created it. It is a ministry. It shows a picture and lets us understand intimacy. If we didn’t have this example it would be hard to know that type of relationship with our heavenly Father.
Back in Matthew 5:31, Jesus talks about divorce and references Deuteronomy 24:1-4 where Moses talks about divorce and the right men have to leave their wives. There are two schools of thought because of how Moses communicates this and what it says in Matthew. Obviously our society has a skewed view of divorce because the statistics are staggering, but that is not what they are talking about when referring to it in the bible, there is more…and even the Pharisees tried to justify when testing Jesus in Mark 10. They start questioning Moses’ statement about just getting a certificate of divorce and still being righteous, but Jesus comes back saying in my pastors words, “it is a heart issue”, meaning just because you do the acts to get a “correct divorce” doesn’t mean you fixed anything…the problem is a hardened heart. And Jesus also states that because we are made one flesh in marriage, “What therefore God has joined together let no man separate.” This answers their question of whether or not is makes divorce ‘right’.
Now…as much as I believe that divorce is wrong, I know that there are circumstances that divorce is seemingly the best option and also that it falls within biblical parameters. I am not speaking about that. But, the last thing my pastor said was profound, true, and forgotten. God restores!
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Acarigua or Bust!!
I mention in our “about me” that our hearts are geared towards missions. We often talked about missions while we were dating, even though it was a short dating period, we shared our hearts. Spreading God’s message around the world was something we were both passionate about. Spencer and I have both been to foreign countries to serve the Lord, Spencer to Egypt and Mozambique, and I to Belize. If you have gone on a foreign mission trip I am sure you can relate when I say it is absolutely life changing. I say this about foreign mission trips only, because you are completely stepping out of comfort zones and leaning on your relationship with God to guide you through. I am not saying mission trips inside the U.S. aren’t effective for your walk with Christ or meaningful, but there is something about completely leaving everything you know and walking into a different world. It opens up a way to be more intimate with our Father. For me, it was eye opening to really grasp that God is everywhere. It amazed me to see believers, who I went to tell about Jesus, already worshiping the same God I knew! And because someone else had sacrificed their time, fears, and flesh to go and tell others about Jesus, I and others were able to see God’s work and help continue to grow the Kingdom. There is something else that I saw with those who were believers that was actually condemning. Most of the people didn’t have nice things or even a complete home to live in, but they were sold out to Christ. They didn’t need anything else. It was a true love for Christ I saw even in the midst of what we would call desperation. I know I am talking about how others ministered to me. I am sure you have heard many missionaries tell you the same thing about how they went to minister only to be ministered to. It is true. Yes, there are so many people who need to hear the Truth about God’s love also, which is why we go, but there is also a growth and a deepening of your own relationship with Christ.
Since we’ve been a married couple, we haven’t been on a trip, but soon that is all about to change. Our home church, Parkview Baptist Church in Tulsa, is also passionate about mission work and has ministries set up in Venezuela, Russia, India, and Turkey. Spencer and I feel led to be apart of the team going to Venezuela this summer. Our church has made many trips there over the years and has helped start what is now known as the First Baptist Church of Venezuela! This church has blossomed out to now form 100 churches and missions! We are very prayerful and excited about going as a couple to this trip. We both feel that we are to use what God created, marriage, as a tool. We hope and feel led to really grasp what God intended marriage for as we venture in His unfailing will for our lives.
I am writing this blog so that those of you who are believers can be praying for us as we prepare for this trip. For me specifically, pray for my fear. We will not be able to take our one-year-old daughter on this trip for safety reasons (although we do want her and our future children to start coming with us as soon as she/they are old enough). The duration of the trip is 10 days, and for a mommy, it is very difficult to be away from my daughter. I need to be confident in the sovereignty of God and His will for my/our life. As our friend Brent Higgins once said, “There is no safer place than in the will of God.” I don’t want to waste my life by drowning in fear and lies that Satan feeds my mind. I wish to be engulfed with the works of our Father, and a mighty, useful servant for His Kingdom.
Since we’ve been a married couple, we haven’t been on a trip, but soon that is all about to change. Our home church, Parkview Baptist Church in Tulsa, is also passionate about mission work and has ministries set up in Venezuela, Russia, India, and Turkey. Spencer and I feel led to be apart of the team going to Venezuela this summer. Our church has made many trips there over the years and has helped start what is now known as the First Baptist Church of Venezuela! This church has blossomed out to now form 100 churches and missions! We are very prayerful and excited about going as a couple to this trip. We both feel that we are to use what God created, marriage, as a tool. We hope and feel led to really grasp what God intended marriage for as we venture in His unfailing will for our lives.
I am writing this blog so that those of you who are believers can be praying for us as we prepare for this trip. For me specifically, pray for my fear. We will not be able to take our one-year-old daughter on this trip for safety reasons (although we do want her and our future children to start coming with us as soon as she/they are old enough). The duration of the trip is 10 days, and for a mommy, it is very difficult to be away from my daughter. I need to be confident in the sovereignty of God and His will for my/our life. As our friend Brent Higgins once said, “There is no safer place than in the will of God.” I don’t want to waste my life by drowning in fear and lies that Satan feeds my mind. I wish to be engulfed with the works of our Father, and a mighty, useful servant for His Kingdom.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Music Man
What if you take away music? Think about it. I am not just talking about the music we sing to in the car, but from tv shows and movies too. How boring would it be?
My first date with my husband was kind-of like a blind date. We had only talked on the phone for about a week. (Our story is unique and fun, but for sake of this blog I'm only giving the short version.) Anyway, I didn't realize he was a "music man", a good one, until after our date. So, you can't say I liked him for his guitar people! He is so brilliant at music. He is recognized for his amazing bass guitar talent, but he can play any instrument as if he'd been playing his entire life. I am only speaking of his ability to play...he is also brilliant at music theory. Having said all that, I have learned soo much about music. I can now pick out instruments and follow them in a song. I can name the instrument. I can understand how and why certain notes mesh with others in order to sound 'good' to us. I have also learned that it is so complicated. It is math. We often conversate over the 'why' and 'how' of music, which brings me to the question I asked in the beginning. I don't think we realize how music affects us. When we are watching that sappy love movie with the beautiful chords in the background working with the words in the scene it is the music that makes the words have meaning. Think about if in that same sappy movie the music was taken away...would the words mean as much? We use music to match whatever emotion we are feeling and it can be beautiful. I can't imagine how powerful the music will be like in heaven. I mentioned music being math. My husband brought that to my attention in a conversation...I asked how composers could think to do some of the things they put together, and he responded by simply saying, it was already created, just like math. Math isn't something that was created, it is only being 'figured' out and still is. This sat in my mind for a few days. It makes me think of those who believe in evolution over intellegent design (God). Anything that man has ever 'made' or 'invented' was already made by God, they just tapped into the knowledge. So talking about music, and how it surrounds us is a perfect picture of how God works. He is everywhere and it is only by Him that we even experience the brilliance of music. He created everything. I sometimes imagine God as this GIANT man that is peaking in our universe and to understand just how everything...I mean everything works within itself...I imagine him sucking in everything, until there is nothing. That may be hard to follow, but in my mind it helps to understand. You can pull apart and dig and research all the processes to a process to a process of something, but it still has God stamped all over it no matter how simple it may be. So, this new thinking as opened up a whole new way for me to appreciate my Creator and acknowledge his divine intellegence.
My first date with my husband was kind-of like a blind date. We had only talked on the phone for about a week. (Our story is unique and fun, but for sake of this blog I'm only giving the short version.) Anyway, I didn't realize he was a "music man", a good one, until after our date. So, you can't say I liked him for his guitar people! He is so brilliant at music. He is recognized for his amazing bass guitar talent, but he can play any instrument as if he'd been playing his entire life. I am only speaking of his ability to play...he is also brilliant at music theory. Having said all that, I have learned soo much about music. I can now pick out instruments and follow them in a song. I can name the instrument. I can understand how and why certain notes mesh with others in order to sound 'good' to us. I have also learned that it is so complicated. It is math. We often conversate over the 'why' and 'how' of music, which brings me to the question I asked in the beginning. I don't think we realize how music affects us. When we are watching that sappy love movie with the beautiful chords in the background working with the words in the scene it is the music that makes the words have meaning. Think about if in that same sappy movie the music was taken away...would the words mean as much? We use music to match whatever emotion we are feeling and it can be beautiful. I can't imagine how powerful the music will be like in heaven. I mentioned music being math. My husband brought that to my attention in a conversation...I asked how composers could think to do some of the things they put together, and he responded by simply saying, it was already created, just like math. Math isn't something that was created, it is only being 'figured' out and still is. This sat in my mind for a few days. It makes me think of those who believe in evolution over intellegent design (God). Anything that man has ever 'made' or 'invented' was already made by God, they just tapped into the knowledge. So talking about music, and how it surrounds us is a perfect picture of how God works. He is everywhere and it is only by Him that we even experience the brilliance of music. He created everything. I sometimes imagine God as this GIANT man that is peaking in our universe and to understand just how everything...I mean everything works within itself...I imagine him sucking in everything, until there is nothing. That may be hard to follow, but in my mind it helps to understand. You can pull apart and dig and research all the processes to a process to a process of something, but it still has God stamped all over it no matter how simple it may be. So, this new thinking as opened up a whole new way for me to appreciate my Creator and acknowledge his divine intellegence.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Work It Out
Lately, I've been trying to lose the last 10lbs from my pregnancy with Audrey, it is not easy. I have my good days and bad. I can get really really motivated and tell myself to eat good and exercise more than normal and I go real hard, but I am easily distracted and then left with guilt and remorse and no change. For some reason I don't have much self discipline in that area, I never really thought about it either...until I had a baby. There are a couple of reasons I yearn to lose that 10lbs. One, to be back to my pre-pregnancy weight. Two, I set a goal and it would be an awesome feeling to accomplish it. Finally, when you are losing weight you tend to eat better and exercise more, which in turn makes you feel better all around. I want to one day be that health nut and hopefully will encourage my children to follow in good decisions as well. It just makes you happy when your body is healthy....of course I have to put a little Jesus in this...lol. This also relates to being in the Word. When you have that self-discipline and are on with reading the Bible you feel good and radiate a happiness that you can't get anywhere else. For me personally, when I am not in the word regularly or I'm 'distracted' I feel gross and far away from God. And like when you've stopped working out for a few weeks and come back, you kind-of have to start all over and work out some soreness (spiritual soreness) for a few sessions.
These past few weeks have been hard on my family. My father-in-law is in ICU on life support. It is strange coincidence that I wrote my last blog about rejoicing the Lord in the hard times and grieving the night before all this went down. My husband and his family have a perception that has touched my life forever. The trust that they have in Jesus is known and shown clearly and although this is the kind of situation that seems to test that trust and can be hard to really see and understand just how much Jesus loves them, still they rejoice because they love Him and know that whatever happens it is for the glory.
I said all that at the beginning because although I have been ministered to by watching my family, I had also been distracted. It has been a busy week with family in and juggling with 5 babies under 2 that I wasn't in the word. Not that I didn't pray, gee whiz, but in order to communicate to God you have to be in His word and I can tell when I am not. Much like taking care of your body, when you aren't working out your spiritual body you tend to feel bad and fall in a rut. Today was the first day back to church since the incident and I was rejuvinated and motivated(one reason why it is so important to go to church). I also believe that when your body is healthy it helps your spiritual walk (mind, body, spirit is all connected), but that too is another blog for another day. I find that with me, working out and reading my bible are alike in that, I have high goals to achieve with both, they require self-discipline, and they have great results!
These past few weeks have been hard on my family. My father-in-law is in ICU on life support. It is strange coincidence that I wrote my last blog about rejoicing the Lord in the hard times and grieving the night before all this went down. My husband and his family have a perception that has touched my life forever. The trust that they have in Jesus is known and shown clearly and although this is the kind of situation that seems to test that trust and can be hard to really see and understand just how much Jesus loves them, still they rejoice because they love Him and know that whatever happens it is for the glory.
I said all that at the beginning because although I have been ministered to by watching my family, I had also been distracted. It has been a busy week with family in and juggling with 5 babies under 2 that I wasn't in the word. Not that I didn't pray, gee whiz, but in order to communicate to God you have to be in His word and I can tell when I am not. Much like taking care of your body, when you aren't working out your spiritual body you tend to feel bad and fall in a rut. Today was the first day back to church since the incident and I was rejuvinated and motivated(one reason why it is so important to go to church). I also believe that when your body is healthy it helps your spiritual walk (mind, body, spirit is all connected), but that too is another blog for another day. I find that with me, working out and reading my bible are alike in that, I have high goals to achieve with both, they require self-discipline, and they have great results!
Friday, March 5, 2010
Rejoice!
Some of what I have been trying to say in bits and pieces of my blogs I found in a perfect summary. I read this, and immediately wanted to share it! I was reading "Rejoice" by Karen Kingsbury and Gary Smalley (book 4 of the "Redemption Series") and the first three chapters made me so nauseous that I didn't want to read anymore. Even though these books have such a real grip on understanding the truth of God's love through real life scenarios, this one just got to me. If you know me, you know that I struggle with fear and worry. I have to constantly be on guard for satans attack on my mind. Anyway, I still wanted to read the book, but I had to know if everything worked out...so...I skipped to the end. When I was looking through the end notes to get back to the story I caught this...
"God understands grief. Jesus wept when he saw the crowd's response to Lazarus in the tomb. Death, illness, and painful trials were never God's intention for his people. Since the fall of man, it has been the way of the world. But even so, God gives us a way out of the misery.
Be joyful! Rejoice always!
This doesn't mean you'll never cry. To the contrary, if your heart is soft for God, you'll cry often. You'll weep when it's your turn to stand vigil at a hospital bed, or when you stand there on behalf of someone else. But if you make a decision to rejoice, then deep inside you will always have a reason to go on, a reason to get up in the morning. Your grief won't be that of a person without hope; rather you will grieve because pain and death and tragedy are sad. Very sad. But you will have hope because you believe the truths that go along with faith in Christ. God is in control...He has a plan for everyone who loves him...Death is merely a door for those who believe in him...And he will make good out of every situation.
See?
What other response could we have to that kind of God but joy?"
-Gary Smalley
This was at the back of the book as "A Word from Gary Smalley." It really spoke to me and it is the truth. This world is scary and bad things have been happening all over the place, but we 'Rejoice' because our God is King and for whatever reasons that we don't understand it is all apart of His perfect plan! But, that is why it is so important for us to 'relate' to one another to get through the 'hard' of life and to love one another....and why we need to be saved, so that we can be with that God for eternity because there will be one day soon that we won't grieve, be scared or worried or cry, but REJOICE and sing and dance and laugh in our new glorified bodies with hopefully our loved ones! He told us these things in the bible for a reason...so that we can rest.
"God understands grief. Jesus wept when he saw the crowd's response to Lazarus in the tomb. Death, illness, and painful trials were never God's intention for his people. Since the fall of man, it has been the way of the world. But even so, God gives us a way out of the misery.
Be joyful! Rejoice always!
This doesn't mean you'll never cry. To the contrary, if your heart is soft for God, you'll cry often. You'll weep when it's your turn to stand vigil at a hospital bed, or when you stand there on behalf of someone else. But if you make a decision to rejoice, then deep inside you will always have a reason to go on, a reason to get up in the morning. Your grief won't be that of a person without hope; rather you will grieve because pain and death and tragedy are sad. Very sad. But you will have hope because you believe the truths that go along with faith in Christ. God is in control...He has a plan for everyone who loves him...Death is merely a door for those who believe in him...And he will make good out of every situation.
See?
What other response could we have to that kind of God but joy?"
-Gary Smalley
This was at the back of the book as "A Word from Gary Smalley." It really spoke to me and it is the truth. This world is scary and bad things have been happening all over the place, but we 'Rejoice' because our God is King and for whatever reasons that we don't understand it is all apart of His perfect plan! But, that is why it is so important for us to 'relate' to one another to get through the 'hard' of life and to love one another....and why we need to be saved, so that we can be with that God for eternity because there will be one day soon that we won't grieve, be scared or worried or cry, but REJOICE and sing and dance and laugh in our new glorified bodies with hopefully our loved ones! He told us these things in the bible for a reason...so that we can rest.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
The Victory
I always catch myself thinking about heaven and the day when Jesus is to return, and I get really wrapped up in trying to figure it out. Obviously, we won't know til the end, but the Bible tells us of many events (or revelations) that are to take place that we can only imagine details about. It BLOWS my mind. I may just let my fingers get kerried away and hope that I make sense to you. This blog kind-of ties into my salvation blogs...
The book of Revelation in the bible is one of the hardest to read. Not only because it is condeming, but it is flat out scary. Especially when you get to all of God's judgements. First with opening the seven seals, then the seven trumpets, then the Bowl judgements. I mean people are killing each other, the sun turns black and the moon turns blood red, the stars fall to the earth!! This is really going to happen. (I do believe though that the saved aren't here to experience this wrath.) Who's team do you want to be on? Then there is the great white throne judgement where we are ALL judged for our sins on earth and if your name isn't written in the Lambs Book of Life you were judged and thrown into the lake of fire (Hell) But then....the saved see all things made new! A new heaven and earth and a new Jerusalem. We get to walk with God and "...He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will be no longer any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away." Revelation 21 :4. Finally, we can relax from reading the previous chapters that make our hearts beat fast, stomach turn, and our shoulders tense. The reason and truth behind why we are to follow Christ... to have eternal life with Him. Everything on earth is temporary. Now is our chance to be the Christians we are called to be and to help lead others to Christ, so they too will have eternal life. It seems so simple to have our names written in that book of life. The bible says that if we confess our sins and believe that Jesus died for us, and ask Him into our hearts we are saved (saved from Hell). The bible also says that we are to bear fruit in keeping with repentance, meaning the fruit is what is our good works on earth. We have to continuously repent for our sins, because we are sinners. That is why it is so important to grow in Christ and have that relationship with him. We aren't to stay stagnant in our walk, but continue to learn and grow. That is the 'hard' I was talking about in a previous blog. It is a daily battle to win against sin and our flesh, but we have been given a full set of armor. No amount of sin can keep us away from Him, but it is written all over the bible that we are to grow. It also doesn't matter what sin you have committed. Nothing can keep you from the love of Christ. All we are to do is know that He is Truth and admit we are unworthy. Remember when Jesus was dying on the cross and the guy next to him was being crucified for being a thief and he said to Jesus I believe in you and Jesus then said, "today, you will be with me in paradise?" What a statement Jesus made just then. Sure he will be judged (because God is a just God), but he now has eternity instead of death and all he did was acknowledge that Christ was who He said He was. Here is the real verse...Luke 23:42-43 "....And he was saying, 'Jesus, remember me when You come in Your kingdom!' And He said to him, 'Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise.'"
I think too, we all need to really grasp the reason why Jesus had to die. I think that unsaved...and some saved all know that Jesus died for our sins, but the reasons exactly why are left unclear and it is easy to walk away. It is simple. Our God is a just God. He is perfect. We can't fathom perfection, because we haven't seen it, but He is. When Adam and Eve sinned the punishment was death He warned them of that. That was what we call the "Fall" of man. It is our own fault that disease, death, hunger, sadness, loss, depression, you name it has filled our earth. We did that, not God, He gave us freewill. See, Adam and Eve were made perfect in order to be in His presence. A perfect God can't be with something that isn't. That is why there is separation now. So, God sent a son to die for us so that we have a chance to be renewed and so that He is still just. His son was crucified for you and me!! He took our place so that we don't have to die and get what we deserve...Hell! God loves us, and He made a way and is still a true, good, loving, perfect God. So to answer so many peoples question of "If God loved us why won't He save us?" HE DID!!! Unfortunately, we all have to die on earth, but that isn't our end. There will be a day that Jesus returns and "the dead in Christ (those loved ones who have died that have been saved) will rise first. Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and we shall be with the Lord." 1Thessalonians 4:16-17
Oh goodness, I could go on and on! I haven't even touched on Paradise and Hades! That is another blog for another day!
In the mean time, I encourage all of us to examine our lives and make sure that we are glorifying that perfect God who saves us and to read our bibles!
The book of Revelation in the bible is one of the hardest to read. Not only because it is condeming, but it is flat out scary. Especially when you get to all of God's judgements. First with opening the seven seals, then the seven trumpets, then the Bowl judgements. I mean people are killing each other, the sun turns black and the moon turns blood red, the stars fall to the earth!! This is really going to happen. (I do believe though that the saved aren't here to experience this wrath.) Who's team do you want to be on? Then there is the great white throne judgement where we are ALL judged for our sins on earth and if your name isn't written in the Lambs Book of Life you were judged and thrown into the lake of fire (Hell) But then....the saved see all things made new! A new heaven and earth and a new Jerusalem. We get to walk with God and "...He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will be no longer any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away." Revelation 21 :4. Finally, we can relax from reading the previous chapters that make our hearts beat fast, stomach turn, and our shoulders tense. The reason and truth behind why we are to follow Christ... to have eternal life with Him. Everything on earth is temporary. Now is our chance to be the Christians we are called to be and to help lead others to Christ, so they too will have eternal life. It seems so simple to have our names written in that book of life. The bible says that if we confess our sins and believe that Jesus died for us, and ask Him into our hearts we are saved (saved from Hell). The bible also says that we are to bear fruit in keeping with repentance, meaning the fruit is what is our good works on earth. We have to continuously repent for our sins, because we are sinners. That is why it is so important to grow in Christ and have that relationship with him. We aren't to stay stagnant in our walk, but continue to learn and grow. That is the 'hard' I was talking about in a previous blog. It is a daily battle to win against sin and our flesh, but we have been given a full set of armor. No amount of sin can keep us away from Him, but it is written all over the bible that we are to grow. It also doesn't matter what sin you have committed. Nothing can keep you from the love of Christ. All we are to do is know that He is Truth and admit we are unworthy. Remember when Jesus was dying on the cross and the guy next to him was being crucified for being a thief and he said to Jesus I believe in you and Jesus then said, "today, you will be with me in paradise?" What a statement Jesus made just then. Sure he will be judged (because God is a just God), but he now has eternity instead of death and all he did was acknowledge that Christ was who He said He was. Here is the real verse...Luke 23:42-43 "....And he was saying, 'Jesus, remember me when You come in Your kingdom!' And He said to him, 'Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise.'"
I think too, we all need to really grasp the reason why Jesus had to die. I think that unsaved...and some saved all know that Jesus died for our sins, but the reasons exactly why are left unclear and it is easy to walk away. It is simple. Our God is a just God. He is perfect. We can't fathom perfection, because we haven't seen it, but He is. When Adam and Eve sinned the punishment was death He warned them of that. That was what we call the "Fall" of man. It is our own fault that disease, death, hunger, sadness, loss, depression, you name it has filled our earth. We did that, not God, He gave us freewill. See, Adam and Eve were made perfect in order to be in His presence. A perfect God can't be with something that isn't. That is why there is separation now. So, God sent a son to die for us so that we have a chance to be renewed and so that He is still just. His son was crucified for you and me!! He took our place so that we don't have to die and get what we deserve...Hell! God loves us, and He made a way and is still a true, good, loving, perfect God. So to answer so many peoples question of "If God loved us why won't He save us?" HE DID!!! Unfortunately, we all have to die on earth, but that isn't our end. There will be a day that Jesus returns and "the dead in Christ (those loved ones who have died that have been saved) will rise first. Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and we shall be with the Lord." 1Thessalonians 4:16-17
Oh goodness, I could go on and on! I haven't even touched on Paradise and Hades! That is another blog for another day!
In the mean time, I encourage all of us to examine our lives and make sure that we are glorifying that perfect God who saves us and to read our bibles!
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
God Is Love
Well hello, all. So I'm still new to writing down (typing rather) thoughts that sail through my noggin box. In spite of said 'newness', it was easy to decide what to write (type) about. Okay, write = type...
I want to write about my wife. We have only known each other a couple of years, and in that short time together, I have seen her change so much.
Right off it was simple to see that she was a beautiful and amazing creature that would no doubt care for my future children and home. I also was very confident that my spousal relationship would be one of great companionship. I was correct. But underestimate did I. Kerri has become a best friend that boasts of legend. I believe now that it is impossible for me to explain the kind of bond a husband and wife can have. Now don't get carried away. Kerri and I have plenty of work to do in growing in our relationship, but I am saying that I never imagined being this happy. Jesus Christ is the reason being. Kerri and I both knew and talked about what we desired in a marriage while we were dating. We both knew that as long as we kept Jesus Christ in the center, our marriage would flourish. To me, the center means that anytime we 'relate' (touch, talk, listen, act) we emulate Jesus' example. This means loving her unconditionally.
There is a great truth that plays a part here. Kerri is part of God's creation. Furthermore, she is one of his children, a Christian, and therefore my sister in Christ. Under his authority, we are one flesh. God Himself, stepped into our physical realm to sacrifice His Son, so that Kerri could be in fellowship with Him. He did this in spite of all sin Kerri has committed, or will commit. When I focus on this truth, I cannot help but be the sweetest most compassionate husband I can think to be. I see her for what God has made her and in turn can channel His love into her. This is Jesus at the center. However, I can not boast this all the time. Without God I am incapable of love. It takes walking in God's Word and 'relating' with him first to allow His love to pour into her through me.
The changes I've seen in Kerri have everything to do with these things I speak of. I can look back at where we were when we first met and see a constant climb up, striving for a likeness to the love that God showed us. I am so blessed to have her in my life, and I am so excited for the things God has to teach us in the future.
I want to write about my wife. We have only known each other a couple of years, and in that short time together, I have seen her change so much.
Right off it was simple to see that she was a beautiful and amazing creature that would no doubt care for my future children and home. I also was very confident that my spousal relationship would be one of great companionship. I was correct. But underestimate did I. Kerri has become a best friend that boasts of legend. I believe now that it is impossible for me to explain the kind of bond a husband and wife can have. Now don't get carried away. Kerri and I have plenty of work to do in growing in our relationship, but I am saying that I never imagined being this happy. Jesus Christ is the reason being. Kerri and I both knew and talked about what we desired in a marriage while we were dating. We both knew that as long as we kept Jesus Christ in the center, our marriage would flourish. To me, the center means that anytime we 'relate' (touch, talk, listen, act) we emulate Jesus' example. This means loving her unconditionally.
There is a great truth that plays a part here. Kerri is part of God's creation. Furthermore, she is one of his children, a Christian, and therefore my sister in Christ. Under his authority, we are one flesh. God Himself, stepped into our physical realm to sacrifice His Son, so that Kerri could be in fellowship with Him. He did this in spite of all sin Kerri has committed, or will commit. When I focus on this truth, I cannot help but be the sweetest most compassionate husband I can think to be. I see her for what God has made her and in turn can channel His love into her. This is Jesus at the center. However, I can not boast this all the time. Without God I am incapable of love. It takes walking in God's Word and 'relating' with him first to allow His love to pour into her through me.
The changes I've seen in Kerri have everything to do with these things I speak of. I can look back at where we were when we first met and see a constant climb up, striving for a likeness to the love that God showed us. I am so blessed to have her in my life, and I am so excited for the things God has to teach us in the future.
Monday, February 15, 2010
books, books, books
I wasn't ever really much of a reader growing up, maybe because I had to read for school and to read for pleasure just didn't exist. But, I love to read now! I love inspirational, spiritual, fiction, and romantic books. I thought I would let you in on my latest find...
My mother-in-law got me a book called "Redemption" by Karen Kingsbury and Gary Smalley, it is part of a series (The Redemption Series). I read it, loved it, and went to get the rest! I am almost finished with the third ( I have a problem of starting several books at the same time so sometimes it takes me a while to finish) there are five in the series. I keep thinking that it is going to get slow and boring, but she really keeps you wanting more! It is inspirational, spiritual, fiction, and romantic! My favorite combination! This is my first time reading her work and I want to read every book she ever wrote. I haven't met anyone who doesn't love them. I need to give some credit to Gary Smalley too, I am eager to read some of his books as well.
I am also loving the devotional "Jesus, 90 days with the One and Only" by Beth Moore. It is great for busy people because there isn't much homework and it is like a nice wind down for evenings before bed.
I have a GIANT book list, I have a goal to read 8 books by Easter. Hoping by letting others in on my goal I will actually do it. I hate when I say I will do something and start out real strong and then fall off. It gets on my own nerves. So, I will let you know when I finish!
If you have favorite books, comment and tell me! I love to hear peoples favorites!
My mother-in-law got me a book called "Redemption" by Karen Kingsbury and Gary Smalley, it is part of a series (The Redemption Series). I read it, loved it, and went to get the rest! I am almost finished with the third ( I have a problem of starting several books at the same time so sometimes it takes me a while to finish) there are five in the series. I keep thinking that it is going to get slow and boring, but she really keeps you wanting more! It is inspirational, spiritual, fiction, and romantic! My favorite combination! This is my first time reading her work and I want to read every book she ever wrote. I haven't met anyone who doesn't love them. I need to give some credit to Gary Smalley too, I am eager to read some of his books as well.
I am also loving the devotional "Jesus, 90 days with the One and Only" by Beth Moore. It is great for busy people because there isn't much homework and it is like a nice wind down for evenings before bed.
I have a GIANT book list, I have a goal to read 8 books by Easter. Hoping by letting others in on my goal I will actually do it. I hate when I say I will do something and start out real strong and then fall off. It gets on my own nerves. So, I will let you know when I finish!
If you have favorite books, comment and tell me! I love to hear peoples favorites!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
ANGELS!
Angels are cool. I love to just let my mind go and try to contemplate them. Of course, I am talking about God's angels, not evil angels (demons), they give me the creeps and I do not think good things about them. The verse in Hebrews says that we may entertain angels without even knowing! I think about that a lot! Goes along with what I was talking about the other day with being kind and loving others. Also reminds me of the story of "Beauty and the Beast."( only we don't get turned into a beast, just judged in the end). I sometimes go overboard and think that I can catch them....for instance, I went to wal-mart (imagine that) one day just to pick up a couple of things. I left Audrey with Spence hoping it would be a quick trip. So, I had that wal-mart attitude to avoid everyone, stay focused, and get out. I came to the checkout only to have the chatty cashier, of course, right?! She was that sweet girl that was overboard with peppiness, I got annoyed fast. A few minutes into her compliments and short talk it dawned on me....she could be an angel and I am being rude!! I immediately changed my attitude and enjoyed the last minutes with her, walking out confident that I just met an angel. I get home and tell my husband what I found, he just chuckled. We later had the conversation again only to remind me what the verse said, we don't know that we entertain them and that it was probably my conscious (the holy spirit) that was telling me to be nice. I felt very silly, I really did think I caught one in disguise. I can't wait to really see one! I've been studying a little about them, they are just neat to learn about. They are all around, protecting us, watching, and even disguising themselves. It is overwhelming if you really start thinking about that spiritual warfare going on all around us. I look forward to the day that we too will join in with our Maker and fight for victory!
Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13:2
Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13:2
Monday, February 8, 2010
Good = Hard
Losing weight, exercise, studying, working, eating healthy, relationships, quitting harmful habits ( I'm sure you can add to the list)...what do these things have in common? They are all good for us, but require self-disipline and hard work, right?
For me, relationships, is one I have the hardest time with. Over the years, I have learned a few reasons why, but I still need to be reminded. It is an amazing gift just to be able to 'relate' to one another in the first place.
Relationships with others are needed in our lives and can be blessing. And a relationship is required to know our Creator. A relationship is being connected to someone, whether it be romantically or platonic. ( Just to clarify though, I am not speaking of boyfriend/girlfriend or marriage relationships in this blog) Sometimes there are relationships that are a little more challenging than others, and frankly I think we, Christians, have fumbled at being examples of how to love the unlovable (hard to love). We can only do this in Christ, not on our own, "I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides (remains) in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing." John 15:5. For those who are skeptical of Christianity because of hurt feelings and such, know that "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God..." Romans 3:23 , it is "hard" to be Christlike and easy to fall into sin. "For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it." Matthew 7:14, meaning that it is real hard to follow Christ, but don't the things that we work so hard for always result in victory and accomplishment? Through the Word of God (the bible), we have all the information, inspiration, motivation, guidelines, and examples to learn how to truly love each other.
Back to those difficult relationships... We are commanded to love one another, but we can't without loving God with our everything..."'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 22:37-39.
These are commandments. I need to learn to love others with patience, forgiveness, kindness, and goodness, like Jesus showed so that I may show my love to Him. "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:34 &35. And to love those unlovables doesn't neccessarily mean you have to fully engage with them, it may mean just showing kindness, and maybe forgiveness in your heart towards them. To love others is just to love. God is love, so if I am following Him that love should radiate. For example, a few months back I went to the tag agency to get a tag for our car. I am new to this town and I am not familiar with the set up in this particular agency. There were several lines filled with people, so I just sat (I had Audrey with me) to wait on the lines to clear. I got sidetrack looking out the window and staring that I hadn't noticed I was being called to the front. "YO", yelled the worker trying to get my attention, and oh man did my blood begin to boil! I went to her practically growling and corrected her by saying, "you call me ma'am!". Throughout our transaction, she continued to be extremely rude and I left so angry and upset at how I was treated, my first reaction was to call her manager....and I did. I called only to find out she was the manager, and talked to someone under her, only to feel pathetic and embarrased. I hadn't done anything but give her the point for getting under my skin and ruining my day and if she had known I was a Christian, I just ruined my witness. What I should have done was be patient and understanding. For all I know she could have been having a horrible day, much less life. I had no idea what her homelife was like, and her job had to be boring and repetitive. Instead I ruined my chance to show her that true love, that hope. It sounds corny, but it is true and what we are all called to do. That is loving the unlovable (because it is so hard, it reaps good things). I could have prayed a silent prayer and left saying, "I hope you have a better day, " rather than, "I am calling your manager!" Oh goodness, I feel worthless. haha! That is only one example too...there are so many times that I reacted out of selfishness, and what am I left with...nothing.
Like I said, I am in practice at learning how to respond in a Godly love rather than a foolish love.
For me, relationships, is one I have the hardest time with. Over the years, I have learned a few reasons why, but I still need to be reminded. It is an amazing gift just to be able to 'relate' to one another in the first place.
Relationships with others are needed in our lives and can be blessing. And a relationship is required to know our Creator. A relationship is being connected to someone, whether it be romantically or platonic. ( Just to clarify though, I am not speaking of boyfriend/girlfriend or marriage relationships in this blog) Sometimes there are relationships that are a little more challenging than others, and frankly I think we, Christians, have fumbled at being examples of how to love the unlovable (hard to love). We can only do this in Christ, not on our own, "I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides (remains) in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing." John 15:5. For those who are skeptical of Christianity because of hurt feelings and such, know that "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God..." Romans 3:23 , it is "hard" to be Christlike and easy to fall into sin. "For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it." Matthew 7:14, meaning that it is real hard to follow Christ, but don't the things that we work so hard for always result in victory and accomplishment? Through the Word of God (the bible), we have all the information, inspiration, motivation, guidelines, and examples to learn how to truly love each other.
Back to those difficult relationships... We are commanded to love one another, but we can't without loving God with our everything..."'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 22:37-39.
These are commandments. I need to learn to love others with patience, forgiveness, kindness, and goodness, like Jesus showed so that I may show my love to Him. "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:34 &35. And to love those unlovables doesn't neccessarily mean you have to fully engage with them, it may mean just showing kindness, and maybe forgiveness in your heart towards them. To love others is just to love. God is love, so if I am following Him that love should radiate. For example, a few months back I went to the tag agency to get a tag for our car. I am new to this town and I am not familiar with the set up in this particular agency. There were several lines filled with people, so I just sat (I had Audrey with me) to wait on the lines to clear. I got sidetrack looking out the window and staring that I hadn't noticed I was being called to the front. "YO", yelled the worker trying to get my attention, and oh man did my blood begin to boil! I went to her practically growling and corrected her by saying, "you call me ma'am!". Throughout our transaction, she continued to be extremely rude and I left so angry and upset at how I was treated, my first reaction was to call her manager....and I did. I called only to find out she was the manager, and talked to someone under her, only to feel pathetic and embarrased. I hadn't done anything but give her the point for getting under my skin and ruining my day and if she had known I was a Christian, I just ruined my witness. What I should have done was be patient and understanding. For all I know she could have been having a horrible day, much less life. I had no idea what her homelife was like, and her job had to be boring and repetitive. Instead I ruined my chance to show her that true love, that hope. It sounds corny, but it is true and what we are all called to do. That is loving the unlovable (because it is so hard, it reaps good things). I could have prayed a silent prayer and left saying, "I hope you have a better day, " rather than, "I am calling your manager!" Oh goodness, I feel worthless. haha! That is only one example too...there are so many times that I reacted out of selfishness, and what am I left with...nothing.
Like I said, I am in practice at learning how to respond in a Godly love rather than a foolish love.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
The Joys of Motherhood
I love being a mommy so much! I was thinking the other day of all the JOYS that come with motherhood...like...
- the ability to do squats with 17lbs in one arm 1000 times a day
- the ability to use my feet and toes like two extra hands
- seeing your baby pick up something you do (like waving)
- the ability to eat while feeding her
- the ability to sleep anywhere and anytime
- folding her little clothes
- watching her grow and learn
- getting a nice headbutt when she loses balance
- always wearing clothes with spit up or slobber on them
- running to wal-mart all the time for something
- picking out outfits and trying them on her (may not be her favorite)
- laughing with her
- getting my face pulled and tugged on
- being the one she needs
- rocking her to sleep
...there are so many more little things that I could add to the list, but it would be way too long. I am so thankful for our daughter.
- the ability to do squats with 17lbs in one arm 1000 times a day
- the ability to use my feet and toes like two extra hands
- seeing your baby pick up something you do (like waving)
- the ability to eat while feeding her
- the ability to sleep anywhere and anytime
- folding her little clothes
- watching her grow and learn
- getting a nice headbutt when she loses balance
- always wearing clothes with spit up or slobber on them
- running to wal-mart all the time for something
- picking out outfits and trying them on her (may not be her favorite)
- laughing with her
- getting my face pulled and tugged on
- being the one she needs
- rocking her to sleep
...there are so many more little things that I could add to the list, but it would be way too long. I am so thankful for our daughter.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
